ENNEAGRAM 6w7 - the buddy.

[hostage]

The traits of the Six and the traits of the Seven reinforce each other. This subtype is more clearly extroverted, more interested in having a good time, more sociable, and, for better or worse, is less intensely focused on either the environment or itself than Sixes with a Five-wing. In this subtype, there is also a dynamic tension between the main type and wing. The Six focuses on commitment, responsibility, and sacrifice of personal pursuits for the sake of security, while the Seven focuses on experience, satisfaction of personal need, and keeping options open. (People of this subtype can sometimes seem like Twos.) They can be affable, supportive, and strongly identified with others. Sixes with a Seven-wing are more eager to be liked and accepted by others than the Six with a Five-wing and are also more hesitant to speak out. The Seven-wing adds sociability, playfulness, and enthusiasm, but the Six component can be uneasy with this, so Sixes with a Seven-wing frequently monitor the reactions of others to see if they are behaving acceptably.

Healthy persons of this subtype desire to feel not only accepted and secure with others, but also happy, particularly with regard to material well-being. They have broad areas of interest and often have one or more hobbies or pastimes. People in this subtype are friendly and sociable, taking neither themselves nor life that seriously, or at least not solemnly. Many Sixes with a Seven-wing are attracted to the performing arts (acting, popular music) or other professions that allow them to combine their energetic, interpersonal qualities with discipline and craft (advertising, marketing, managing, law). They tend to be self-deprecating, and if possible, turn their fears into occasions for reassurance, further bonding with others, or even humor. Healthy Sixes with a Seven-wing are usually extremely playful and funny, since a sense of humor is one of their most salient means of coping with life and its tensions. They are generally more extroverted than the other subtype.

Average Sixes with a Seven-wing are also hardworking and loyal, but begin to have problems with procrastination and initiating projects. They tend to depend more on others for reassurance and will usually seek advice from a number of sources before coming to an important decision. If they get conflicting advice, they tend to be more indecisive than the Sixes with Five-wings. They do not handle anxiety, tension, or pressure will and often humor is used to deflect others, an d their passive-aggressiveness to get them out of unpleasant situations. Increasingly, the subtype complains, frets, and turns the Seven's propensity for envisioning options into a tendency to conceive of everything that can go wrong in a situation. At the same time, the Seven-wing causes them to succor themselves with various distractions and compensations. Overeating, drinking, and substance abuse may enter the picture, along with nonproductive “hanging out” (the good ol' boy, the gal who hangs out at the local bar or club). Sixes with a Seven-wing may not take the strong political stands of Sixes with a Five-wing, but they tend to become highly opinionated and quite vocal about their likes and dislikes. Because they are afraid of confronting the real sources of discontent in their lives, however, their anxieties about personal failings or important relationships are often displaced onto helpless “third parties” – the “kicking the cat” syndrome.

Unhealthy persons of this subtype are more disposed to becoming dependent on others, and do not attempt to disguise the depth of their emotional needs. They may become struck in abusive working conditions while dependent upon other people, addictive substances, or both. Inferiority feelings combine with the desire to escape from themselves. Unhealthy Sixes with a Seven-wing have few means of dealing with anxiety, and as anxiety gets worse, they become increasingly emotionally erratic. People of this subtype are in a flight from anxiety, tending to become manic rather than paranoid. They act out their unconscious fears, flying into hysterical overreactions much more readily than the other subtype, making them highly unpredictable and reckless. They may alternate between desperately clinging to destructive relationships and lashing out at their supporters. This subtype is also subject to debilitating panic attacks, since anxiety, rather than aggression, has the upper hand. Suicide attempts, as a way of eliciting help, are likely. [ x ]