EXSILIUM - information.

» PLAYER INFORMATION

Player NAME: Pana
Current AGE: 28
Player TIME ZONE: Pacific (UTC/GMT -8)
Personal JOURNAL: pana
Player PLURK: pana

» CHARACTER INFORMATION

Character NAME: Jesse Pinkman
Canon & MEDIUM: Breaking Bad (TV)
Canon PULL-POINT: Season 5 Episode 8 - "Gliding Over All"
Character AGE: 26
Character ABILITIES:

Jesse is an ordinary human with ordinary abilities. He gets into brawls very frequently but he isn't much of a fighter and almost always loses. He claims to be a blue belt in Jui Ryo Ki Kung-Fu (with shuriken certification!) but has never displayed any martial arts skill. He can at least shoot a handgun with decent accuracy after a lot of FPS-playing and lessons with Mike. Although coveted for his ability to cook high-quality methamphetamine, Jesse works strictly from a memorized procedure and has no deep knowledge of chemistry.* He does, however, know his way around a lab and has developed some skill in engineering. Combining his artistic intuition and scientific experience, he's surprisingly competent at designing equipment.

* As a result of his first weapon's evolution, Jesse has become a master chemist.

Character HISTORY:

( SPOILERS )

Character PERSONALITY:

Jesse Pinkman is in over his head. It's his constant state of being. He's a suburban white boy who's spent years of his life fronting like he's some kind of hardcore gangsta, but the truth is that all his thug swagga fools nobody and only serves to get him into some serious shit. For all his wisecracking and disrespectful backtalk, Jesse's neither truly street nor streetwise. He comes off as a clown: silly and overambitious, lacking the callousness required to succeed at his dangerous trade. As his journey goes on, he seems increasingly lost and afraid, especially in the face of mortal peril. Helpless confusion is the expression most often written on his face. His continued survival is merely a result of luck and reflex.

Jesse's lot in life is not a result of unfortunate circumstances. He grew up in an upper middle class neighborhood and a loving family. No horrible accident befell him. He was never orphaned. His family never fell upon hard times. He was just a slacker, a delinquent who couldn't give any fucks about school, a dropout who only ended up kicked out of his home because he refused to stop doing drugs and his parents refused to continue enabling his destructive lifestyle. He began selling drugs to fund his own drug habit, not out of any kind of noble sacrifice or great need.

Yet, despite a lack of tragedy in Jesse's past, he is a tragic person. He wants desperately to be good at something, and it so happens that drug-dealing is the only thing he's ever felt good at doing. He also desperately wants approval, and that desire is a vulnerability that others exploit. Jesse has always just been a kid without direction, waiting to be guided and directed so that he can make himself useful and prove himself valuable. Due to his insecurity and fear of messing up, he's prone to making excuses and pointing fingers. He can be unbelievably stubborn, too proud to ask questions or admit to his mistakes. His drug use began as a result of his fears, providing relief from the pressure of trying to succeed at school and live up to his parents' expectations.

Later in his life, drugs became an anesthetic to numb the pain of the trauma he experienced through his ongoing criminal activity. For a long time he seemed in denial of his own addiction, rolling his eyes at others' concern for him. He viewed his crystal meth as an art form as well as entertainment. But he hit rock bottom when he started taking heroin, which claimed the life of his girlfriend and sent him into suicidal despair. Addiction remained a struggle, and probably always will. He went through rehab once only to relapse several times later.

The greatest threat to his recovery is his guilt, which overwhelms him frequently. He blames himself for his girlfriend's overdose and he refuses to forgive himself for committing murder. He believes himself entirely removed from all goodness now, stating bluntly: "I accept who I am. I'm the bad guy." And he does have many despicable traits. His frustration with his own powerlessness can lead him to be selfish in turn, greedy and manipulative of others weaker than himself. At one point he starts showing up to group sessions for the sole purpose of selling meth to other recovering addicts.

Even so, his descent into darkness is not nearly as far as he believes. He clearly continues to operate according to a strong personal moral code. Jesse's greatest strength and his fatal flaw is his loyalty. He will remain at someone's side through their darkest hour, even if that person is entirely undeserving. He's honor-bound to his word, incapable of backstabbing someone to whom he's made a promise no matter how much he's come to despise that person. Though he's often paranoid and accusatory, he has every right to be; he's been betrayed numerous times by those he's trusted, and even he isn't aware of the full extent to which he's been deceived. And although he responds readily to any threat with violence, he hesitates when it comes to taking a life. He has a deep appreciation for life and can be incredibly sweet and gentle, especially with children but even with animals and insects.

Jesse has positive qualities beyond his sentimental devotion and caretaking. He can actually be a true entrepreneur at times, resourceful and clever. When he's feeling confident, it shows in his work. With him, a little encouragement goes a long way. And although not articulate, he's surprisingly observant. His ability to catch on, cover up, and roll with the punches is why he's not only a good friend to have, but an instrumental one.

» EXSILIUM INFORMATION

Chosen WEAPON:

Beretta 84F Cheetah. This particular Beretta (unlike the gun Jesse's familiar with) is modified with special cartridges. Rather than firing ordinary bullets, this pistol shoots a variety of darts. Depending on the situation, these darts will contain either etorphine, methamphetamine, lysergic acid diethylamide, ricin, or a special computer chip which embeds itself under the skin to nullify all superhuman abilities until it is removed.

The evolution of Jesse's weapon does not occur within the object itself. Jesse is the one who evolves as he gains experience. As time passes, his knowledge of chemistry and engineering increases at an accelerated rate, putting his ability on par or perhaps surpassing that of his genius mentor, Walter White. Eventually, Jesse will be able to synthesize any chemical product (provided he has the necessary material) for use in his darts, as well as alter the machinery to make his gun more accurate and effective. His intuitive connection to his weapon will make its upgrades easiest to engineer, but Jesse's increased scientific knowledge will be applicable in many other situations.*

* Weapon swapped as of February 1, 2013, modified as of January 9, 2014.

Character INVENTORY:

( 1 ) AMT Backup .380ACP
( 1 ) pistol-shaped torch lighter
( 1 ) glass oil pipe
( 1 ) white graphic t-shirt
( 1 ) pair of faded black jeans
( 1 ) pair of black sneakers

» SAMPLES

Third PERSON:

The woman in purple leads Jesse into another room, and he follows as if in a trance. With every step, he becomes more convinced that he's dead. He opened that door and got shot in the face. What's happening now, he assumes, is the afterlife. Nothing the woman says really seems to refute that, either. Sure, it isn't any kind of afterlife he expected... but then again, he's seen a lot of weird stuff in comics and movies. He's open to a different interpretation.

And relieved that he didn't end up in Hell, the way Mr. White told him he would.

He chews on his lower lip as he walks in silence, trying to push back those memories of a life he no longer has to live. But as he raises his eyes to take in this next room, his stomach sinks. Weapons everywhere. It's an armory. She begins a speech about how he's supposed to choose one, but he's barely listening. His mouth opens several times to protest, but he can't get a word in. Or he can't find the right words. He doesn't want a weapon. That's his point.

But she goes on like it's so simple, like it's so expected of him, that he ends up nodding his consent. Of course it would be like this. He'd die the same way he lived. Of course. And maybe he'd been too quick to assume this wasn't Hell. Too bad, so sad. In his mind, he can hear Mr. White taunting him for all his failed efforts to be pure.

Jesse ducks his head, pretending to be looking at the selection when he's really trying to hide the tears gathering in his eyes. It's going to be like this. He's going to have to choose something from this place and kill whoever they want him to kill. He walks past the rows, touching this and that, weighing different items in his hands. He remembers a time when this would have seemed awesome. Like a video game.

He catches sight of something out of the corner of his eye. A familiar thing. As he gets closer, he recognizes it as his Beretta. The same gun he'd used to murder Gale Boetticher a year ago. Only it's not the same. When he ejects the magazine, he finds not a normal cartridge, but... darts. Poison darts, not bullets.

"This is it," he utters. The weapon for him.

» ADDITIONAL NOTES