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[hostage]

SCI » 008 » 024

_“ Hey, it's me. Wait for the thing. _”

Comments

voice

[kicktomorrow]

Lisbeth is incredibly sexy. Do you really want to turn that down?

voice

[jurisimpudent]

You were listening too?

[kicktomorrow]

...like she said, we live together.

So what's the issue, exactly?

[jurisimpudent]

I...The issue is that I abstain. That's the issue.

[kicktomorrow]

You know, I was a virgin until I was seventeen. I know it's terrifying if you don't know what to do. You're worried you'll look stupid, right?

[Good cop, sexy cop.]

It's not bad st all if it's with a friend. We're all friends, right?

[jurisimpudent]

No!

[Even he realizes that was a bit horrible.]

I don't...I do not even know you. Or her. Or Pinkman, for that matter!

[kicktomorrow]

Then get to know us? We don't bite unless you're into it.

[You really can't faze her, puppy.]

[jurisimpudent]

Into...what?

[kicktomorrow]

...okay, what was your version of the birds and bees talk?

[jurisimpudent]

What do you mean, "birds and bees"?

[kicktomorrow]

Oh, Jesus Christ.

The sex talk.

[jurisimpudent]

...Oh. I...utilized an anatomy text.

[kicktomorrow]

[A long, long silence, because Jane is torn between dismay and hysterical laughter.]

Edgeworth, it's...a lot more complicated than that. And better.

[jurisimpudent]

So I've heard. From everyone on this damned ship. Since none of them ever stop talking about it.

[kicktomorrow]

I noticed.

I can explain it to you, okay? Do you think that could help? At least then you'd actually know something and not be stuck on an anatomy textbook.

[jurisimpudent]

I - That's - I know what sex consists of, thank you! Explanations are completely - completely - unnecessary.

[kicktomorrow]

Take a breath, s--Edgeworth.

[jurisimpudent]

I am breathing!

[kicktomorrow]

You're upset. Count backwards from thirty for me.

[jurisimpudent]

I will not. And I'm not going to be condescended to!

[kicktomorrow]

I'm not trying to condescend to you.

You're a lawyer, right? You want to know the facts? How can you do your job if you don't get this? It's an enormous part of the human condition whether you have it or not.

[jurisimpudent]

I - I know the facts already. Like I said: I've seen textbooks.

[kicktomorrow]

There's facts, and then there's the way it feel when someone draws their fingers down the back of your neck and kisses you under your jaw. It's not the same thing.

[jurisimpudent]

[...distracting.]

Well, I do not see how...that would help me win a case.

[kicktomorrow]

[She hasn't even started yet.]

It helps you understand why people do things. War, art, murder, revolution--people do all kinds of things for sex and love. If you're missing that you don't know this essential part of how most people live. Have you ever let someone just hold you for a while? Touch your hair? Tell you they wouldn't want to be anywhere else that minute except with you?