EXSILIUM - contact.

[hostage]

UNIT№409



_“ Hey, it's me. Wait for the thing. _”

Comments

[payback]

I want to know what they said! I want to know where you're getting this from! Make something up! Ask to mix another chemical! Figure out a way out!

[hostage]

Look, here's how it works: you got one thing you can do, you get brought to a place by people who need you to do it, you do that thing as good as you can for as long as you can so they don't waste you and replace you. They don't gotta say anything. That's the way it is.

[payback]

So don't cut them off, ask if you can train in something else too.

[hostage]

Ain't nothing else I can do. Nothing I'll ever do half as good.

[...except kill people.]

[payback]

Oh, okay. So the answer is to give up and keep doing the thing you feel horrible over without even trying something else?

[hostage]

You think I haven't tried?! Nothing takes, okay. I'm too stupid.

[payback]

Oh, my God - you have serious problems.

[hostage]

[Thanks for the revelation, Rin.]

[payback]

Don't just CONSIGN yourself to... doing something you HATE because you think you're too STUPID for something ELSE!

[hostage]

You think this is Disney or something? Like if I just try hard enough, I can do anything? Honest to god, I tried. I got out - I was staying outta this business up until the second I took my last breath. But that's what happened, right? I stopped being useful, I tried going straight, and what'd that get me?

[payback]

There's telepaths here or something. We could try getting one of them to drill a skill right into your brain. [Meanly sarcastic.]

[hostage]

Oh, ha ha.

[payback]

Why not? I bet that'd stick.

[hostage]

[He rolls his eyes and folds his arms over his chest, sulking.]

[payback]

[On a roll now!] You could weave baskets. Sandals. Carve and paint small wooden animals! Install lighting!

[hostage]

[He's visibly shutting down, really. Sure, yeah, just lay it on him. Not like this is anything new.]

[payback]

[Well, she does respond to that. Withdrawing some on her own side, watching him with guard up. More apparent than usual really.]

Honestly. Find something else to do. Even if you were terrible at it you might hate yourself less. Is it really like you like this?

[hostage]

I don't wanna die.

[At this point in time, anyway.]

[payback]

Then be smart about it. There must be a point where you can start.

[hostage]

You're not hearing me. There's nothing to start. I'm never gonna be some great hero, okay. I'm never gonna be strong enough they can't get rid of me. They've got those people. And I ain't a genius, either. I ain't Tony Stark. I'm not ever gonna be building 'em the best weapons or coming up with strategies or... or whatever! Without the meth, I'm on the chopping block, you understand? Nobody needs me anywhere but the lab. I'm the best chemist in the world and that is it. You put me anywhere else and I'm useless, I'm expendable, I got no leverage. I couldn't even survive in the regular world without that. What am I supposed to do here, where people just disappear once they get used up? If I stop being worth their investment, I am gone.

[payback]

I don't care about heroism! All you'd have to do is make a living... they might not be that terrible! You could try at least!

[hostage]

[He's shaking his head and the rest of him is shaking, too. He's been hiding it - no one's really seen at all except maybe Nill, in glimpses, in his head - but he's terrified. He's more scared of the Initiative than maybe every single person who's talked about rebellion.]

[payback]

[she stares at him. A hard stare.]

They want us to like them.

[hostage]

That don't mean anything.

[payback]

Yes it does.