hostage | EXSILIUM

You don't know him, Steph.

And Mike, he's... He's just smart. He knows when it's over, when to get out.

[That stings, and she wonders if that's what Jesse's trying to do, but that seems unfair.]

I do.

[Saul might not have been a good person back in their world, and he might have done some really, really awful things, but she knows he's trying to be better. He wouldn't just abandon Jesse.]

It's not over, things are screwed up right now, but it's something we can fix.

[As far as Jesse knows, he's just being honest. Saul and Mike were both already pissed at him for screwing up something way smaller than this. Now...]

I know how it's gonna play. Saul's got his thing going and he's not gonna wanna lose it. But he will lose it, if he sides with me. Right? 'cause nobody cares I was on the right side. Nobody cares I did this for the Initiative. All they're gonna hear is Jesse's stealing powers. Saul's gonna do what makes him look good, Steph.

That bitch wouldn't let him represent me even before I did this. She said I had to choose between Sonya and Edgeworth. Sonya and fucking Edgeworth, Steph, to defend me. But maybe Saul woulda fought that before.

Now? He ain't gonna touch it. It's too dirty for him. He's gonna let Roslyn assign a goddamn prosecutor to defend me, and he gets to wash his hands and go back to playing king while Sonya and Edgeworth take turns fucking me.

[She lets him talk, glad that he can't see how her expression twists up in uncertainty, because she doesn't want to worry him.]

He's not like that anymore, he's not just gonna throw you under the bus to save himself.

[She has to believe that, just like she had to believe that Saul was sorry for poisoning Brock. She doesn't know what she'll do if he hasn't change, if he was lying to her.

When she finally breathes out, it's shaky.]

There's another defense attorney here.

[If it'd been just the once, maybe, Jesse could believe Saul might stay on his side. But how many times was it that Saul turned on him the second Mr. White was back in power? Not just with Brock. That was the worst time, but it wasn't the first time. And Jesse wants to believe, too. It's killing him, that this is happening again. But he expected Saul to be here hours ago. And he never came. Because it'd look bad.

He takes a deep breath, trying to steady the wavering in his voice:]

Who?

Barbara Gordon.

[She can't... not tell him, she can't listen to him like that and not let him know there's someone that can help even if Saul lets them down.]

I think you're wrong about Saul, but if you're not... she'll help.

You sure about that?

[His friends won't even save him. Why would a stranger?]

You have a right to an attorney.

[And Babs might be a vigilante, but she'll do what's right.]

Not if Roslyn's got anything to say about it.

[She can understand that Rosyln's in a difficult position right now, that she probably didn't ask for this responsibility, but if what Jesse's saying is true:]

Cops are fucking assholes, but there's a hell of a lot of us from Earth, and we know how this shit is supposed to go. You'll have your attorney.

We ain't on Earth anymore, and it's easier to hang one guy everybody hates than ten guys who still got a lotta friends running free out there.

I ain't stupid. They're gonna make an example of me. And then they're gonna get their nice little peace talks going and feel real good about themselves.

Jesse.

[There's something a little sharp in it, trying to get him to focus.]

Everybody doesn't hate you. Hell, pretty sure most of the Transports adore you, so cut this shit out.

[She remembers their conversation in the clinic, about him not being good, and that's fine, but it doesn't mean he hasn't to aint himself as the villain while the jury's still out.]

No one's gonna try to hang you, the focus is on the mutineers, just-- [she sighs] What would it take for you to be willing to give Tempest her powers back?

[No one adores him. They don't even like him. They just want to control him, and they tell him how sweet he is and how hard-working he is and how far he's come, but they don't trust him. They have no faith in him. And here it comes now, Steph doing it, too.]

...I won't.

[She can't do this over the phone.]

Hold on.

[And then she's there, in the middle of the room he's being held in. She looks tired, worn out, but mostly she just looks worried.]

Jesse.

[She doesn't know how to fix all this, and she hates that it's all her fault.]

[Jesse lets out a quiet giggle when she appears. He tosses his tablet aside, settling back against the wall where he's perched atop a pile of mattresses.]

Go ahead. Say it.

[And she just frowns, confused by both the giggle and the request.]

Say what?

The thing you came here to say. Your speech. Let's hear it.

I don't have a speech.

[It's plaintive, almost, because she doesn't know why he's always like this, going hot and cold so quickly.]

I just wanna help.

Nobody wants to help me.

[He's not fucking stupid.]

Don't worry. I didn't bring you up when I did it.

Would you quit it?

[It's a flare of temper, but the words are hissed, because she's not supposed to be in here and she doesn't want to get both of them in trouble.]

Do you just have these bouts of amnesia where you forget all the times I've told you I care about you or love you? Because it sure as hell feels like it.

It's easy to say, ain't it? Three words and this idiot'll do anything for you. But, god, it really sucks when he messes it up. Does something you didn't tell him to do. Then you gotta make the tough choices, like... Do you hit him? Lock him in a room somewhere? Drugs, that one works real good, just get him so fucked up he's drooling all over himself and he won't run away. There's so many choices!

But yeah. I care about you's the best one. He likes that one. Eats it right up.

[She steps back like he's struck her, but it's not because the accusations are true, they just hurt, draining the anger away as effectively as Max's little tricks.

When she speaks again, her voice is quiet.]

I wouldn't do that to anyone, Jesse. And I definitely wouldn't do it to you.

[Not to someone who's been jerked around and fucked over and hurt like Jesse has.

Like she has.]

[And how many times has he heard that one, too? He folds his arms and slouches back against the wall.]

I'm so done with this, Steph.

I did the best I could. And it was never good enough for anybody.

[All she does for a long moment is watch him, still hurt, but she's searching for something, too.

And then it clicks, because it hurt her, too.]

It was good enough for me.

[She doesn't know what else to say.]

[He doesn't believe her.]

I'm not giving it back.

And everybody's gonna fuckin' pay for this.

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whoops ACTION

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